Group Influence

24 Oct

Everyone has an experience with influence. It may be good or bad, but these influences are acquired from the people who are usually around you. Sometimes, a person even adapts a certain habit of their peer such as the way they talk, dress up and even walk. In my case, the influence of my friends taught me to know myself better and lifting me up instead of pulling me down. The people (friends) around me are the one who pushed me to be better and to do better.


Back in second year high school, I remember receiving e-mail from a friend, my best friend actually. Even though it will take me ages to browse through my e-mail three years back, finding that simple letter was worth all the hassle.

As I read the e-mail again after a long time, I found myself asking, “What’s the matter with me?” then I shook my head and laughed for myself. That was me for another pair of eyes. That was me back then. That was me before. Looking at myself now, I could say that a lot has changed.

I was 14 years old that time and I admit that I was immature. I never knew how to handle backstabbing and how tactless someone can be. Being a new student in an exclusive all-girl school, I admit that there was somehow a “culture shock”. Everybody looked classy and sassy, and it was pretty hard to fit in. It was hard to fit-in in all ways. Only a few would make you become a part of a small circle and when the bigger circles aren’t impressed with a group, they would start talking about non-sense. That happened to me once. It was offending, my blood rose to a boiling point and I can’t help but blabber about them. I kept on keeping that anger and talking about it all the time. I never got over that issue during the year and kept the annoyance that I felt for the year. What I didn’t know, my friends are also affected.

Then I received the “magic” letter. I was shocked when a friend said about caring too much and trying to be passive. It did sting my feelings and it hurt.  Partly because I denied what was written and partly because it was true.


For the next few days, I avoided them. It was my pride that pushed me to do that. I was hurt about what they told me and I just wanted to be that crybaby but then, I realized something important. Friends do tell you what’s wrong with you. That’s when I knew that they are my true friends. It may hurt that they basically told me that I’m immature but at least they tell you the problem. Just then, I started to change.

I read the letter one more time. Hurt is necessary for change and whatever change may come, true friends will always be able to bring change for the better. It was a simple e-mail but it meant a lot. It changed me on how I relate with other people in terms of choosing what I want. I became conscious of how I act around people and became more aware of what they may say.


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